Im a Brahmin in love with a Muslim boy for 2 years
Poonam says: May 13, 2012 at 2:28 pm
My name is poonam m in love with a Muslim boy for 2 years and he loves me very much he is intelligent and independent in life and can support me .. me abrahmin and my parents will be against this. They have lots of trust in me. But I fall in love with him and he is very mature. We know our limits. He is very supportive and we want to marry each other. He told he will go against family if they are against but he told for a girl support from parents is very imp and dont want to go against them and he told I dont have to convert nor change a name, can worship god in my house and has every right of my religion but how to put this in front of my family? .. he is also from educated family plz help me thnx ..
Admin says: May 13, 2012 at 10:35 pm
Poonam, This is great that he does not want you to convert and willing to respect your religious beliefs. This is certainly admirable. To make sure, talk directly to his parents and confirm that they are okay if you, and especially your future children, don’t BBS. If you don’t confirm with his parents, he may change his tune a few months before your wedding. Make a point that you will never be in the position of Nirmla.
One additional test to understand his belief system, take him to a Hindu temple. In a Hindu temple, does he see Allah in different forms or they are only idols? Ask him to join for the pooja, like SRK does, just to demonstrate respect to your Brahmin belief system. This is a true test to learn his comfort level and give him an opportunity to know reality of life. After marriage, some day he will have to sit down for a Satya Narayan Katha at your parent’s home. At that time, is he going to say that My One God is in Saudi Arabia (direction), and cannot be in India!! He has a right to decline all these, but you have a right to know facts.
After you are convinced that he is not a love Jihadi, then present all facts to your parents. Do not go against your parents, you will need them one day. It may take a year or two to convince your parents, that is okay because you will have a chance of making fully “informed” decision. Get back to us after you take him to a Hindu temple.
Poonam says: May 16, 2012 at 2:50 am
He is ready to come but he told I respect your religion but I will not fold hands and believe in One God …. he came also(to a Hindu temple) and he also ensures that our children will go and will follow our teachings….
Admin says: May 16, 2012 at 5:38 am
Ok, he believes in One God…. is that God only in the direction of Saudi Arabia (Kaaba) and as described in the Koran? Or, can that One God also can be in a Hindu temple in a Krishna’s murti? Tell him what Hinduism is all about. Some day he will have to explain it to your children.
Next step, how about the BBS? Will that request ever come up? Confirm with his parents ASAP. If you ever BBS (shahadah for you and sunat circumcision for children), means you will be in Nirmla‘s position one day. Get back to us with the BBS answer from his parents.
Next get answers to 13 questions raised to Rajanpreet.
Poonam, we are just trying to alert to you of all possible complexities of interfaith life. Your Muslim bf also should not be in any wrong concept what is means to have Brahmin new relatives. We wish you (and to your Muslim bf) to make an “informed” decision and have ever lasting Brahmin-Muslim interfaith marriage with equality.
Readers, considering Poonam’s Muslim bf is open-minded (lets trust him for his intentions), what else would you recommend for them?