Muslim girl: I’m in love with a Black Christian

Alia Noor says: March 1, 2013 at 10:20 am

I’m a Muslim girl, and I’m in love with a Black Christian.

We met two years ago, and I’ve been in love with him since. But, my parents will obviously go nuts when they find out. And I’m very against arranged marriages and muslim restrictions on female. What should I do?

He loves me too, and he is a believer. Not polytheistic, and he is “of the books” so why can’t I marry a Christian, if we believe in the same God, share the same beliefs, and Prophets, why can’t we get married?

Thanks to all who decide to help, and please do not bash me with mean commentary -Alia Noor

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Admin says:

Alia, don’t be bother by what others will say. Dogs will always bark! You have to do that is right for you. It is important to make a fully informed decision so you have a higher chance of having a long lasting happy married life.

In short run, yes, your parents will get upset but ultimately they will come to terms. If you wish to please your parents, then you have to change your statement “I’m very against arranged marriages and muslim restrictions on female” and go marry a Muslim boy who does namaz five times a day, believes in Sharia laws, believe in displaying bloody bed sheet and wishes her wife to be obidient to her husband.

No religion is polytheist. Even, Hindus are believing in only one God (Ekam sad vipra bshuda vadanti -Rigveda 1.164.46). All believe that there is only ONE God, only difference is the liberty to express the God. Christians express the God in trinity, three forms, while Hindus are free to express the God however way one desires.

Christians and Muslims believe in the same LORD God as described by Jews, except Christians call Him the Father God and Muslims call Him Allah. So problem will not be the God, or even One God, but problem will be the prophets. You will have to first answer, Is Jesus a Son of Allah, or just one of prophets like Muhammad? If you wish to be happy in your interfaith marriage, we recommend to follow Jesus, not the church!

Further, you will have to decide on how will you get married? Will that be a Church wedding where the church will ask you to sign pre-nuptial agreement to raise children Christian only OR Islamic Nikaah where the Imam will ask the Christian to fake-convert to Islam by Shahadah?

Later, you will have to settle for one of two labels for your children, will that be baptism to announce them Christians or sunat to announce them Muslim? Will children have arabic names or bible based names?

Please let us know some of questions we have raised, thanks. We hope to hear from you soon. -Admin

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Alia Noor says: March 2, 2013 at 9:58 am
Thanks Admin.

Wonderful advice. It made me bold and strong and decisive to take a final stand in my own interest.

I shall discuss with my BF. I am also surprised to find that blood stains are displayed for inspection by family members on the morning of wedding night. That is a really shameful act on the part of islamic traditions to crush emotions of females. -Alia Noor

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6 Comments

  • Zyrah
    March 26, 2013 3:54 am

    Hi all of you. I am in the worst phase of life currently. I m not too happy with my career. I am a biotechnologist but not working as one as I have come to my parents in Dubai after completing my studies in Bombay and there is zero scope in my field here. Anyway, that’s the secondary issue. The main thing is that I have been in a relationship with this guy back in Bombay. He’s a wonderful guy and my parents know him n his family and really like them too. I belong to a very religious muslim family whereas my guy is a firm christian. I have been with him for 8 YEARS now and his family loves me n I love them all too way too much. My family wants me to get married and are looking for good proposals now. I have confessed about my relationship to my sisters and my mom and they have clearly told me that this has NO FUTURE as our faiths are different and that I must get over him. I love him and also my parents too dearly to break anyone’s heart. My man has been very supportive and never gets upset when I don’t get to call him for days together cz of problems at my place. He has changed all his career plans just for me and my problems at home. There is no looking back at this stage when I have spent almost a decade with him. I am very close to his family and they are open heartedly accepting me with the faith that I follow and do not expect me to convert to Christianity. However, my family are not so open minded and would die but allow me to marry a non muslim. I love my parents dearly. They have sacrificed a lot for me. My dad’s health isn’t all that great but still he’s working at the age of 65 so that he can provide me with all the luxuries and let me have a huge wedding. I am so upset. I cannot elope with my boyfriend. That’s the last thing I wanna do to my parents. I want to convince them which deep down I know is impossible. I feel suicidal and always pray to God that if things cannot be the way I want them to, please let me die as I can never choose between my parents and him. I feel very guilty to have my parents and my boyfriend in a situation like this. When we began dating we were just 15 and immature but by God’s grace I found just the right guy for me even at that level of immaturity. He’s the best anyone could ever get and I totally believe God is not upset with me for choosing a christian instead of a muslim coz what I share with him is something so pure.
    I don’t know guys what to do. I am a firm believer in Allah and pray to him 24*7 to help us out. Please if any of u could help me with suggestions whatsoever. Please do. Desperately waiting for comments and suggestions

    Reply at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=4874

  • March 8, 2013 12:27 am

    The Myth: Muhammad Promised 72 Female Virgins for Martyrs.

    The Truth: Prophet Muhammad has never made any promise on any kinds of sexual gratifications in the after life, much less on the alleged 72 virgins.

    It seems to be the staple ammunition for attacking Islam. Mention the atrocities and suicide bombings that are being committed by Muslims around the world and you get the same response – they are doing it for the “virgins in heaven”.

    In various Internet forums and conventional media, Muhammad has been accused of luring foot soldiers, past and present, with promise of eternal copulation in the afterlife. In the process Islam has been tainted with a dubiously sexual tint. Islam seems to be the path where sex-hungry young men can end their lives into a promise of endless erotica.

    The simple truth is, there is nothing in the Quran or Hadith that has ever promised this. Every Muslim knows it.

    Muslims have never been cajoled into doing deeds for the religion in promise of posthumous sex. As Muslims, we must never condone suicidal activities that take away the lives of innocents. They are against the teachings of the Prophet. The vilification on the alleged “virgins of paradise” must be dismissed at all costs.

    So how did the issue of the 72 virgins even come about?

    It all started on August 19th, 2001 in CBS studios, USA. This was just a month before the 9/11 attacks.

    The American TV network was broadcasting a program called 60 Minutes. It was featuring a special report on the militant group Hamas and included the translation of an interview between an American journalist and the Hamas functionary Muhammad Abu Wardeh. In the interview, Abu Wardeh was describing how martyrs will be accompanied by the “hur’ain” in heaven.

    At issue in this interview was the correct meaning of the Arabic word “hur’ain”. Translated to English, it means ‘angels’, with no gender connotations whatsoever. But the translators at CBS insisted that it means ‘virgins’. It carried on and broadcasted the translation as such.

    Arabs all over the United States spotted the faulty translation and protested to the TV network. Three experts of the Arabic languages, including Dr. Mather Hathout of the Islamic Centre of Southern California and Hafiz al-Mirazi Osman, the head Al-Jazeera’s Washington made official efforts to correct the translation.

    But CBS still insisted that it means ‘virgins’. The faulty translation was never amended. From then on Islam became known as the sexually perverted religion that promises 72 “virgins” for those who gave up their lives for it.

    The faulty translation took pace after the 9/11 attacks. Websites all over the world, especially those from the USA, began carrying distorted “translations” of verses from the Quran that interpret the word “hur’ain” as “virgins.

    Muslims around the world were potrayed as devotess who were into the religion solely for the promise of sex.
    The damage was done and till today the faulty translation provides a sore point in the true understanding of Islam.

    This myth is still rife today with various forms of distortions and connotations.

  • March 2, 2013 10:22 am

    Hello readers,

    I am from Sydney,Australia, aged 31 years from an asian muslim country. Working in shipping and cargo company, I am in love with a Hindu boy age 30 years(myself elder), very cooperative and intelligent and winning confidence of bosses.

    I want to marry him, but parents are opposing. Being an independent, I have told them that I shall not marry any muslim guy to lead a restricted and miserable life. He has no compulsion for me to convert.
    I have learnt so many things about Hinduism and greatly impressed now.

    Planning to marry as per Hindu customs and get marriage registered here in Sydney.His parents have no objection.

    Seeking advice from all of you please.

    Reply to Aamira at https://www.interfaithshaadi.org/?p=4607

    • Akshay
      March 4, 2013 5:36 am

      Aamira Jalal,

      May God Bless you, see you gave the value to your love, means giving value to you life being with the person, marrying with the person whom you loved.

      Make some commitments about leading the life, commitment means promise. Commitments on worshiping, belief, children’s future, naming them, so that you both should have principles in your life. Good reasons for leading life.

      Regards,
      Akshay

  • March 2, 2013 9:58 am

    Thanks Admn.

    Wonderful advice. It made me bold and strong and decisive to take a final stand in my own interest.

    I shall discuss with my BF. I am also surprised to find that blood stains are displayed for inspection by family members on the morning of wedding night. That is a really shameful act on the part of islamic traditions to crush emotions of females.

    • March 2, 2013 10:52 am

      Absolutely agree, “That is a really shameful act on the part of islamic traditions to crush emotions of females”, even you are virgin, Islamic women should not let such bed sheet get displayed.

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