Haider says: June 19, 2012 at 1:32 pm
Well, I (Muslim) also have a query. I’m in a relationship with a Brahmin gal for around 4 years. I’m still pursuing my education. We both are comfortable with each other’s religion, but the main problem is convincing the parents. I don’t want my partner to convert to Islam for the heck of it, if she doesn’t believes truly. I don’t give a damn to what the society would say. But I don’t want to hurt my parents. How could I convince them?
Admin:
Are you a typical today’s Muslim youth? During your dating period, you will keep convincing the Hindu (or Christian) that you don’t have to convert, I respect your religion, there is only one God so why to fight for it, I don’t give a damn what society would say, …bla..bla..bla…. However, after years of romantic relationship, now you will change your tune that…please convert for my parents, I didn’t knew this coming, for the heck of it, it (Shahadah) doesn’t not mean anything…and so and so. You have mentioned, “if she doesn’t believes truly (in Islam), you don’t want her to convert”, so are you now going to love-proselytizer to convince her that Islam is the only true religion? In the end, if she doesn’t convert for Nikaah, are you going to walk away for the sake of Islam and your parents?
Sorry if we stereotype you. Lets hope you are a different like Shamim, Salman, Seema and Shah Rukh Khan. We admire your thoughts of not converting her. The fake conversion by the Hindu just to please your imam and parents will not do any good to any one. In the end, she will curse you for life being in Islamic life that she had no intention of being in (read Nirmla, Madiha). So think of other options.
This World is for every one; be that Muslims, Hindus, Christians, Jews, Jains and atheists. However, every religious leader tries to prove that they have the true religion and others are wrong. Religious institutions have vested interest that division should continue among people, otherwise they will not have money to pay their utility bills. Don’t get trapped into religious leaders problems. Do that is humane things to do.
The religious labeling (BBS) has no place in an interfaith marriage with equality. Now it is time to respect fellow human the way they are. First remind your parents that neither you nor they are true Muslims, unless you are praying five times a day and running life 100% as written in Islamic books. What was written thousands of years before had it’s own historical perspectives, but may not be relevant today. Ask them how they will feel if your gf asks you to convert to Hinduism? Ask them how they will feel if a Christian gf asks you to baptize for a church wedding or baptize your children? By making the Brahmin gf take 5 min of Shahadah oath for conversion, yes, you will please your parents and the imam, but not to the God. God is not fool; He knows what you are up to! Also, your gf is not fool too, one day she will learn of this communication. At that time, she will curse you forever to make her change her birth religion. Instead, respect her the way she is and she will double respect for what you are (read Salman-Amrita). Parents may not like in the beginning, but ultimately they will realize the truth (read bro Rauf). Best wishes convincing your parents.
Readers, what tips can you give to Haider to to convince his Muslim parents for his true love with a Brahmin and his wishes of not converting her?
Also read: Islamic Women Today, Hindu-Muslim marriages, Hindu girl, Muslim girl, Hindu boy, Muslim boy,
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I think this is a good story because you guys talk about islam
Why?
show your parents alisina.org Ali Sina has lots of writings on this topic
If your parents need convincing and are strictly against it then think it over. My parents liked my wife before I even told them I wanted to marry her and they had no problems with her being a different faith. But not all parents are like that and if they will never respect her or accept her in your family, will you be willing to leave them for her?
Think it over before you hurt this girl and her future happiness as well. She is someone’s daughter and am sure her parents also have seen dreams for her. So unless you can give her every happiness and be a good husband in the future to her, don’t pull her along in this if you are not sure. I know right now you guys are young and it seems all is well but I don’t know your family’s situation and how liberal minded your folks are.
Sometimes people also change in the future , so also think it over about how your kids will be raised, and if you will go with her to Hindu events, etc. An interfaith marriage is not for everyone so be honest with her and yourself and discuss these things with her and both of your families. And once you guys decide on something don’t change your mind down the line because like I’ve said this girl is coming into your family, so treat her with respect and love.